Streets of Rage 4 is a game about demographics.
Kid, I know you firmly believe that once you make it to [INSERT TECH CONGLOMERATE HERE] you achieved the good ending. Just know that given sufficient time at your dream corporation, watching how the sausage is made from the inside, sooner or later, you will want to break rank, as well as a face or two.
My least favorite part of the marketing mercenary life is pitching. I've been told I'm good at it, but being good at something and enjoying that something is not mutually exclusive. Most clients want campaigns that are produced at a high level and also cheap. That is something that is mutually exclusive.
History has proven successful campaigns in any endeavor require skilled soldiers, experienced strategists, and quality ingredients. Every client you meet will try and break the meta and still win. Bless their hearts. It's fine that they try, it's not fine to forgo your worth.
Here is an example of how a recent pitch went:
Client:
The deck looks great, the vision is great, just great. Couple followups. We are looking to aggressively steer toward the millennial and gen z crowd. Now, I am Gen X, so I'm far from an expert, HAHAHAHAH, but, I'm wondering how we can insert more hallmarks of their demographic in its campaign DNA.
Me:
Such as?
Client:
Well, I see you included a robust social campaign, Ad buys, competitive analysis, DM's, projections, budget, and whatnot. That all well and good, the basic stuff. But, and please don't take this the wrong way, bro, but we asked you to pitch because you are known as the guy to call when a campaign needs to be "Swagged up," know what I'm saying?
Me:
No.
Client:
HAHAHAHAHA I love your style man! You remind me so much of Ray Holt from Brooklyn nine-nine. Has anyone told you that?
Client 2:
Oh wow Boss, now that you mention it he really does! You are so right! Sorry, I just wanted to say that!
Me:
Ah, I see. You want to hear about the influencers, the music, the networking, the social engineering, the lifestyle, money, and the drugs. The so-called cool guy stuff.
Client:
Yes! Exactly, where is all of that in this presentation?
Me:
It's up there, disguised as the boring stuff.
Client 2:
HAHAHAHA he's so funny! That was a joke!
Client:
... I see. Well, that number seems high, can we chop at that tree?
Me:
Of course, it's your party. It's just gonna be a smaller, less exciting tree.
____________________
I lost the contract because I knew I wouldn't be able to provide the client what they wanted at the price they were willing to pay. I mean, I could have lied and got paid, I did really need the money, but these days I've become intimate with the belief that a lie is no different than taking on debt. The bill always shows up, and you don't learn how much interest has accrued until its time to pay.
Anyway, your network is your net-worth as they say, so to keep the relationship solid I put them in touch with my homie who has zero problems taking anybody's money and they got paid as fuck and put together a pretty dope campaign. That hurt, but I'm not mad because I still have my dignity HAHAHAHA. I changed my mind, kid, keep that job at Splooglezon forever, fuck integrity.
rip TB rip TC rip Tall-T. Love is wise, hatred is foolish. Get out there and do great things, we believe in you. Also Jobs.
The Protoculture Mixtape : Issue : People : Limbic
