Issue : Games : Destiny's Halo

What the fuck is goin' on? First the Harlem Shake is the internet club banger phenomenon of the millennial for, like, a week. Literally. People have turned on that shit faster than those Lay's chicken and waffle potato chips. I still want to try them tho, for the racism.

Shout's to PSY, sorry man, this internet thing is getting quicker and quicker. 15 minutes has become 15 clicks. Hey, at least you got to meet Hammer off it. When you get to the pasture tell Young MC the world says hi , and we miss him, terribly.

And now Bungies new epic Destiny comes out of hiding to much pomp and circumstance. We all get promised a bunch of gameplay and an explanation of what the fuck is going on, and it turns out to be a bunch of industry dudes circlejerking in between slow pans of concept art. I think I saw some gameplay of a dude running up a hill also. I don't know.

I know, I know, I don't get Halo, and I would be creaming in my pants over all of this stuff if I did. I get that. But this is a new IP. I am supposed to be in the pit of the cult of the mire of excitement along with everybody else. I want to be on the Hype train, I am looking at the caboose chug out of the station and I need to be on that ish. Someone tell me what I have to do to go to there!

What is it? Is this going to be, like, Halo Skyrim? Why and how did they get Microsoft to sign off on a ten year multi-game multi-platform deal on spec? Oh... wait... yeah. Well, I guess Bungie did legitimize and all but save their system that one time. I figure that does buy some trust.

Alright, I dunno. I'm going to play it, so... (fucking hate this time of year, there is nothing going on in games.)

- Oh, so that new PS4 controller. Hey, if it ain't broke... Find a way to make it look silly. I don't even have a real opinion on it, that is how over it I am hoping they get their shit together, just emotionally divorced from that company... "Oh hey, yeah a new controller... ok, why? Will that somehow make Final Fantasy XIII good? No.. Ok. "

- Witcher 3 is in development. You snooow that! Damn, hold on I have something... just let me check my bookmarks. Nope, nothing. I have been on a real Indie game kick, here are the top three I played this week.

- Even Cowgirls Bleed

It's about a sad cowgirl. And also, it's a text adventure. Deal with it.

- Split Fighters

Everybody asks me why I don't talk about my personal life on the  blog. Well first of all because it's the goddamn internet. Fix your face, this shit is here for good. And also, because I compartmentalize, and have a hard time processing my emotions (awww. hug me, yeah that's it.. lower.. Woa!). Another reason being that I don't have to, because people make games about it and I play those, then get back to work.

- Depression Quest

Speaking of that, this one is serious business. Play this, and if you see any of yourself in it, get help. Nothing wrong with that. I did, and I am. Or get in touch with me. No joke. Most of you know me or my gamertag, but if not send me a message through Steam. I will answer. This waking life is tough, specially for cave dwellers like us. But you have people that have your back, just gotta let us know. Awkward, right?! Yea, get over it.

Anyway, yeah, hope you choke on information as usual. I am going to smash on this leftover K-BBQ like a Hoover street Criiiip. And, um... Jerbz.

The Protoculture Mixtape v.148 Issue : People : Clamant