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Great question. If I only had one video I could play it would be this.

Thursday, June 27, 2019

Issue : Games : Boilerplate


Duck Season PC is a game about resonance.

The first time I was in Hong Kong I had two objectives. I was gonna get away from the people I thought were controlling me, then I was gonna discover the real Hong Kong. I'll be honest, I didn't know what "The Real Hong Kong" meant then, and I don't know now. Kids are just so fuckin' stupid on so many levels and you don't even realize how dumb you sound till so much... but I digress.

The second time I was in Hong Kong I had one objective, survive. I was working for a tech company that made widgets that drove gamers crazy. My job was to convince everyone that the widgets were cool.

My boss was obsessed with this nebulous, idealized, absurd vision of American "gamer" cool. From his head and daddy's wallet he gave corporeal form a Frankenstein's brand monster pastiche of The Matrix films energy, 4chans "/b/" message board's attitude, and a top coat of "You Got Served" style hip hop aesthetic, but with all the African American parts surgically removed.

He is Chinese but felt the Chinese version of cool wasn't cutting it, so he put all of the American cool ambassadors on a plane to help Hong Kong be more in line with the cool singularity. I didn't get the vision, but that was ok because I am a black man with zero confusion about what I was supposed to be doing. I pound the drum, I do the "Africa" face, the company gets to be inclusive, I get to be paid.

The job looked good on paper but paid peanuts and I lived in one of the most expensive cities in the world. I was dead broke, a month from being evicted, and parking my car miles away to avoid it being repossessed.

I had not a dollar to spare for this trip, at the end of my rope, staring into the abyss. But the job was the thin green branch I was holding onto for dear life and in marketing rule number one is never ever show weakness or the jungle eats you. So if being on that plane meant selling a liter of blood to pay for gas or selling my version of a child, my desktop PC, just to be miserable on another continent, it is what it is.

While we were there he would have the US and HK cool ambassadors sit around a table in this business park. When a person walked past he would call on a random employee to describe the passer-by's life based on what they wore and what kind of product they were like to buy. For instance, a person in an expensive suit might be going to work and might buy this type widget to trade stocks, a person in a tracksuit might be a homemaker who buys this type widget to play games. That type of thing.

Some guy walked by with a suit and tie on. Boss called on me but I didn't hear because I was busy being mad that this meeting was called so early in the morning and I was counting on the hotel's continental breakfast to be my one guaranteed meal of the day. My homie from the HK office had to tap me on the shoulder to get my attention.

The convo went like:

Boss: "Who is that?"

Me: "Some Suit."

Boss: "That's obvious, but what else?"

Me: "He's just a kid. His suit don't fit, his shoes are scuffed. He took the bus but got off blocks before the office so people don't find out. He can't buy shit from us because our stuff is oppressively expensive, but he is sure as hell in the office and on message boards talking about what he has or is gonna get."

Boss: "What a loser."

Me: "He's your market."


The boss didn't like me much, and I didn't blame him. I didn't understand him, and he didn't understand me. Or maybe we understood each other just fine, and that was the problem.

Either way, I was worried about nothing, the trip went fine. Turns out street food in Hong Kong is super cheap and the people are hella nice. The cool ambassadors from HK had me over to their houses and we ate good. Even had time to check in on some old friends. They aight. Turns out "The Real Hong Kong" is a thing after all.

Anyway, Duck Season PC is to Pony Island what Mariah Carey is to Pony Island. Also, rip TC rip TB rip Tall-T. Love is wise, hatred is foolish. Get out there and do great things, we believe in you. Also Jobz.

The Protoculture Mixtape : Issue : People : Puckish 

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