Ghost of Tsushima is a game about portholes.
An extra-medium time ago I was a fresh eared Navy boot at Great Mistakes. As I've stated before I joined the Navy because I'm lazy and the Marines sounded harder. People suggested the Army, Air Force, or the National Gaurd, but I said no because I wanted to be in the military.
Also, signing up for an organization with a monastic dedication to both inflicting and dying from gun violence is something I could have found on any northern Californian streetcorner. Why go to the grocery store if there is food in the house?
Anyway, it turns out the Navy was hard too, and boot camp really crushes that easy narrative the moment you step off the bus. The Recruit Division Commanders were pit bulls, the training was non-stop pain, and every single person involved in the process, including fellow recruits, took great enjoyment in watching people wash out.
I remember laying in my rack one night after taps debating pissing my pants or not because our RDC got frustrated that recruits thought "Pissin' was free." so he made the rule that anyone who got up to use the head would have to run a mile in the Illinois snow before going to sleep. I thought to myself, "this ain't it."
I decided I needed to lower the game's difficulty, and my salvation came the second week by way of the recruit petty officer program. The rpo was designed to identify leaders among the recruits and give them clout and responsibility. One of the rpo positions was a religious petty officer title. Nobody wanted it, nobody signed up for it, and neither did I until I read the roles and responsibilities.
The RRPO was allowed to skip drills to go to church, go to the library, pick up mail, and could get food from the mess hall for something called "communion." All of these freedoms at my fingertips for the low price of pretending to be into something I wasn't all that into.
I already joined the military when I could literally give a shit less about the United States falling off the face of the earth or getting attacked by sentient salamanders. I signed up and within two hours I was in the mess hall at 16:30 during drills eating ice cream and playing dice with the cooks.
The only downside was that other recruits would come to me in their times of great need, talking about loss of family members, unspeakable personal issues, questioning their faith, and a bunch of other soft ass shit I did not sign up for. To keep up the ruse I helped where I could. Convincing the RDC's to lighten up on this one because he was going to break, sneaking that one off to church just to get a break, helping a guy through suicidal thoughts here and there.
Fuck it was annoying. It's like, just because I signed up to be a cop doesn't mean I'm a cop all the time. Anyway, one day years later I'm in Navy rehab talking to my caseworker and while looking at my file he notes that I was the religious petty officer in boot camp and I told him this story almost verbatim.
He looked at me like I was a whole fool and said, "So, to keep up appearances you... You did the job you signed up for." I gave him the smuggest look on earth and said, "Yeah, and those idiot's were none the wiser! Fuckin clutch right?" He fell out laughing, uncontrollably. He said I was one of the most special versions of stupid he had ever run across, and to keep on fooling everyone because it's working great.
I appreciated the compliment at the time, but looking back, I think he might have been disrespecting me.
Anyway, Ghost of Tsushima is off the charts. Fantastic. Rip Tb Rip Tc Rip Tall-T. Love is wise, hatred is foolish. Get out there and do great things, we believe in you. Also, Jobs.
The Protoculture Mixtape : Issue : People : Quaerere
