Resident Evil 3 is a game about deliverance.
Let's pretend that the USPS hadn't been dead since 1971. Let's pretend all this hoo-ha isn't just this week's distraction. Let's pretend this isn't a long play frenemy takeover by a strat sav going ham on the free market.
Let's pretend Wingstop is open cause I'm cravin' lemon pepper wings something fierce and yes I know they deliver but you should know I ain't paying 40 bones for a 14 dollar order stop playin' with me.
What was I talking about? Oh right, deliveries.
You kids might find this hard to believe 'cause you're fuckin idiots but back in 1775 the American States had a hard time communicating. As in the information didn't get around well and if it did it was all bullshit. People were making shit up, selling wolf tickets, putting dead raccoons inboxes and sayin' like, "this is from your momma," basically doing whatever, it got bad.
So the American central government held a continental congress and said, "Ey, we gotta tighten this shit up or this union ain't working out." Benjamin Franklin said, "I got this," stepped up as the first postmaster general, and thanks to a strong central government's focus on providing information efficiently, consistently, and fairly, the US made it through some tough times.
Then came the Postal Reorganization act of 1970, which turned the United States Post Office into an independent agency. Welcome to Gen Pop, dummy. So yeah, the government it saved signed the USPS' death warrant in 1970 and ARPANET ratified it in 1971, but video killing the radio star is old news.
The post office failed in the free market because it was a location-based service. Everyone in the US is accounted for, every delivery person is taken care of as well as possible. Free market delivery is algorithmic-based services, so basically, location means nothing and all employees are playing against the computer.
Every time a person pushes a button, the algorithm begins creating a scenario in time and space that takes an SKU from point A to point B. Once a thing gets from point A to point B the algorithm creates a data point that says,"alright, it took this long to go from A to B, so now let's increase space, and decrease the time." That's it, that's all it cares about, running that script at optimal settings. Something breaking is just another data point.
You can walk outside right now and you will see three types of delivery persons. The USPS, crisp uniform, walking from home to home and stopping to chat with people. The UPS guy, sharp uniform, walking at a brisk pace, ringing a doorbell and getting a signature for a package. And the Amazon guy, street clothes and branded vest, driving erratically while throwing items at porches, literally running full seed, ten hours a day, for their life. I wonder who works for a person, and who works for an algorithm.
Anyway, rip TB rip TC rip Tall-T. Love is wise, hatred is foolish, get out there and do great things, we believe in you. Also Jobs.
The Protoculture Mixtape : Issue : People : Obscuration
