Splatoon 2 is a game about gamut.
I have a hard time trusting any Californian without at least a hundred hours clocked on the Grapevine. I could drive the stretch in my sleep at this point, but I don't because another Californian fact of life is people dying in fiery wrecks on the Grapevine.
It's easy to get lullabied by the 5. Miles of two lane asphalt framed by a Microsoft grassy hill screensaver image peppered with windmills. Then comes the lowered Honda Civic racing the Prelude you swerve around, then come trucks side by side because one truck just isn't enough, and then there is you flipping out into an embankment. And then there is your picture on an Old English lettered R.I.P. t-shirt sold in the parking lot of your high school for 20$ a pop by a graphic artist acquaintance named "Trenchfoot". Such is life.
The Grapevine reminds Californians a long stretch is just as dangerous as a short one. So pay attention, always bring music, it's ok to appreciate the scenery but it's not what the trip is about, and never stop in Los Banos. Just don't.
What did I want to talk about? Oh yeah, so a short time ago I made the trip home to chill with the fam. My nephews were in the living room watching PopMMO, I have no idea what is going on in the children's Minecraft world and I do not understand the words coming out of their mouth when they attempt to explain to me what is going on in said world.
To me, all of these new nations that spring up are simply action items and the question is how to integrate a product into the new reality in such a way as to increase brand recognition, reach, and revenue streams for all parties. I don't mind. I'm just glad I can contribute to something they enjoy. I was tempted to tell my nephews that I had done business with the people talking to them on the other side of the screen. Had given them headphones at the Rooster Teeth Expo, they seemed nice.
Then I thought, why should they care? Then I saw a picture of myself in my younger days on the adjacent dresser, and I was pretty sure I wouldn't have. Never much cared how the sausage got made, I just wanted to play video games. Not much has changed.
Anyway, I hope information understands that the new DuckTales show is fuckin' lit. Dare I say I believe it to be better than the original and anyone that disagrees lives a different kind of life and I really do feel sorry for them. Godspeed, Disney XD. Godspeed. Also Jobs.
The Protoculture Mixtape : Issue : People : Trudge
