Default Tester

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Join Default Tester and save the Galaxy. Service guarantees citizenship. Would you like to know more?

Great question. If I only had one video I could play it would be this.

Oh crap sorry! Extra Credits! Along with Heathcliff, I dedicate this story to the following people, in no particular order:

Ada Lovelace

Kurt Vonnegut

Bill Gates

Steve Jobs

Grace Hopper

Ray Kurzweil

Gabe Newell

Barack Obama

Michelle Obama

The Fam

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Issue : People : Tip of Hats

An error message is information displayed when an unexpected situation pops up. On modern graphical interfaces such as computers and what not they happen a lot, for a lot of reasons, the most famous of them being the blue screen of death. There are many other not so popular ones though. You have access denied, low disk space, out of memory. Stuff like that.

As of yet there is no error message for internet censorship, but given how things are going, there will be a mighty need for one soon. Error 451 should be a thing.

The Protoculture Mixtape v.92 Issue : Games : Registry

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Issue : Games : Quantum Prep

Valve Software is a video game development and digital distribution company based in Bellevue, Washington. They are also gigantic port teasersmegalomaniacs, dark magicians, and puppet masters, with the power to make living breathing grown ass human individuals terrified to purchase video games before the next steam sale goes down.

Think I'm gonna bite at that Just Cause 2 deal early? No, ya damn fool. I am not, when I know it's gonna be in the Square pack I passed up last year! Wha gwon pon de blud clot bwatte bwoy? My Jamaican is getting much better thank you, as well as my patience,  i'll... wait. Your move, Steam.

There is nothing the company can do to surprise gamers short of releasing the next chapter in that game they made about the period of time it takes for the amount of a substance undergoing decay to decrease by half, but they wouldn't be dumb enough to do that.

Well, they might, but I think they have seen enough Duke Nukem Forever launches to understand giving in to fan mobs is less lucrative than waiting to release the event with a level of polish they can be proud of. Also, creative heads jobs are in. Lawdavemercy.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Issue : Games : Dissonance

What if, young Laura Croft actually did get raped, like the newest Tomb Raider trailer is suggesting she's in danger of. For arguments sake, lets say she escaped the cave, made it into the forest, was doing well for a while, got captured again, was raped, and left for dead. But she perseveres, confronts her captors, and saves the day.

In this scenario, Lara Croft in all other games is a recovering victim of rape. Would it be fair to wonder if the strength and fearlessness she personifies as an adult is a coping mechanism for what happened in her past? Would it be fair for this new developer to do that to a character they did not create? Would we still feel comfortable objectifying certain aspects of her character design?

In real life women get raped all the time, and those women have to find a way to get past that. Some do, others end up stuck there forever. Some speak as if games need to move closer to real life in order to be taken seriously, but when the dark, horrible, reality of this mortal coil finds itself anywhere near a game, the song changes.

Real world "Adventure," is short and scary, most real world "Heroes," are sad and fucked up. It sucks, but that's life, it is what it is. We have it pretty good right now as gamers in being shielded from that. We warp zone straight to the good stuff.

No matter how many E3's, GDP's, and wall street public offerings we acquire, video games today are still escapism and empowerment fantasies, as evidenced by how fans react when challenging concepts are introduced. There is a real and lasting cost in moving away from that, a cost I think we are not ready to accept.

The Protoculture Mixtape v.90 Issue : People : Pandora

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