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Sunday, September 29, 2013

Issue : Games : Temperate


Valve's new controller. Valve's new console. Valve choosing Linux to love forever and ever. Yeah... I guess. I don't know what the hell is going on. Everyone in the industry is finding ways to poop the bed so fast it's hard to decide what not to care about more. I should be the last to "meh" this event. I mainline their network API, my virtual office is set up in a Valve made game.

It's just that them flopping toward a saturated console market like a sea turtle to an inflatable swimming pool is kind of sad. Like Mark Zuckerburg announcing he is finally hopping in the ring to do battle with Twitter.

All these new consoles, peripherals, thingamabobs and whatchamacallits popping up. With imaginary markets ready to devour the servings. I have pomp nor circumstance to give to these things.

It feels like 94 all over again, people pushing bad money over good into the dreamers abyss. They make you seem the asshole for asking because it really is a sexy tech, but who is going to buy the Ocular Rift? Who is the core market? Where will the functional practice of this thing happen? "Oh man I just had a long ass stretch of classes, lemme put on my Johhny Mnemonic ass headgear and play roller coaster parachute shotgun until I vomit. And I'm gonna do this everyday!" I know what the Ouya does, I just don't understand why it exists in a market where everything else does what it does. The U-Force, the Virtual Boy, the Wii U.

Remember the Guitar Hero era? Awash in drum kit's and mics and all kinds of plastic peripherals? It wasn't even five years ago. Remember piracy? AAA's not recouping on legacy franchises, and the Ragnarok of surviving in an industry bleeding talent and money, with a fickle, vocal, and promise worn public playing the role of the sieve? That's now. Great time for chances, way to take the vox populi's temperature, and deliver.

Nasa wants to go to mars as soon as possible, the people want food, clothes and medicine. The government, ever stalwart guardians of the every man, side with the people. Nasa says the best way to get food, clothes and medicine is to build smart people. Rocket goes to Mars creating hope and wanderlust in it's wake, hope and wanderlust build smart people, smart people create food, clothes and medicine so everybody can get to mars comfy.

In the long run, the way to get what the people want, is to build a rocket. But rocket building takes money right now, and right now people are like, fuck rockets, I just want to spend an hour or two not worried to death about if my kid is going to get hurt and I can afford the doctors bill, if I'm going to have a job tomorrow, or a pension when I retire at 70 years old. If you can't build me a better life, build me a better distraction.

The video game industry has money, so it's building rockets. I just... don't ask me to care. The company I know and love makes innovative games with great writing, design, function, and wonder. And sometimes they push the yardstick forward on how you receive toys.

This other company is storming a foreign beach with alien weaponry and shaky allies, against an entrenched axis in truce for the greater good, and a population lullaby-ed by the status quo and believing any gaming technology without plug and play tenure persona non grata. Although, it would be nice to play Rouge Legacy on the couch. This computer station gets hot as a mug in the summer. Oh it's fall? well, shit.

And thanks haters for everything you had to say about how late I am to the Dark Souls party and how soft I am for crying about how hard it is. Ya know, talk about my momma all you want she is a strong black woman she can take it, but my cat's? Man? And yeah so what I did cuddle with em after the Catacombs boss stitched me up for the 20th time. We threw a goddamn cuddle party, and my cuddle runs deep, so deep, so deep put 'er butt ta' sleep. Too far? Probably. Oh and JERBZ.

The Protoculture Mixtape v.175 Issue : People : Lucubration

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