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Great question. If I only had one video I could play it would be this.

Oh crap sorry! Extra Credits! Along with Heathcliff, I dedicate this story to the following people, in no particular order:

Ada Lovelace

Kurt Vonnegut

Bill Gates

Steve Jobs

Grace Hopper

Ray Kurzweil

Gabe Newell

Barack Obama

Michelle Obama

The Fam

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Issue : Games : VaultLights

Both Torchlight 2 and Borderlands 2 feel like the same games that gave birth to them. Not cousins, or long last family, but those type of twins that look like each other in most ways. They complete each others sentences and can't wait to let you know they are twins.

Maybe developers think players want the next game to be as close as possible to the one before it, as not to scare and confuse players. Maybe publishers want sequels to be as close as possible to the one before it, as not to scare or confuse profit margins. Maybe players want sequels to be as close as possible to the one before it, because contrary to what we complain about, we are deeply scared of change. It confuses us.

John G and I were talking about Sifl and Ollie coming back a few days ago, and he was taken aback by the fact that I was pretty "whatever" over the idea of it's return. And for the record, that "whatever" is not the Liam Lynch reference of note, it will be coming in the last paragraph, and it will get your earlobes wet.

The source of my ambivalence is that the Sifl and Ollie show that will be airing soon will not be the Sifl and Ollie show from before, it will be a twin, it will be finishing the sentences of an old show, just with a focus on dem video games this time. Not a bad thing, just not a new thing. A year of Bill and Teds and things I loved years away that kids today have no reference to or idea of what even made them awesome can and should only illicit a "Aight, I'll take a look." But John G had a good point when he said I would still watch it and I would still laugh. True, True.

Here is the thing, and I was thinking about this all last paragraph. I may have oversold the whole "Earlobe dripper Liam Lynch reference," thing. It was over the top, and I want to take a step back to reset expectations. Fuck it, lets phone it in and go with the goat rap. Wow, these Dorito's Jacked chips are off the haberdasher, I need these in my life right now. Oh, I am still typing things? I could just backspace, but c'mon, seriously, why?

The Protoculture Mixtape v.107 Issue : People : Enolument

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Issue : People : Borderland Hopper

So, Borderlands 2, huh? A.K.A Dubstep trailer mashers. A.K.A The Grindatorium. A.K.A That game Ash's brother worked on in between Epson salt baths. A.K.A ... Claptrap's adventures in minion-sitting. I am having fun, because the game addressed all of the problems it had promised to address in the love letter sent to me and only me about the stuff I was mad at last time, but then forgot about.

The video options are great options for video adjustment, the menu flow is more polished... All of that shit is 2 legit to start quitting, Hammer-man. Still, and here is the thing, I don't know how to accurately explain this one either, but the game play got a shade of boring about three steps into the tutorial area.

Is there is some hater-aide in that punch, yeap. Some niggling in that wiggling? Racism. but truth up front, the gameplay was in the driver seat the first go round, now I feel as if Claptrap's and Handsome Jacks' fantastic raps (Which by the way, are on track for funniest in game chatter of the year. Shouts to diamond horsies) are carrying the team, while there wasn't much substance given to the gameplay itself outside of murder type and frequency.

Keep in mind I am not that deep, and also keep in mind that the pros so far far outweigh the midget cons in masks, but that is out there and it is what it is. Now having said that, there is also the little mater of... nah, that was about it. Also, Jobz.

The Protoculture Mixtape v. 106 Issue : Games : Butt Stallion says hello!

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