Default Tester

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Join Default Tester and save the Galaxy. Service guarantees citizenship. Would you like to know more?

Great question. If I only had one video I could play it would be this.

Oh crap sorry! Extra Credits! Along with Heathcliff, I dedicate this story to the following people, in no particular order:

Ada Lovelace

Kurt Vonnegut

Bill Gates

Steve Jobs

Grace Hopper

Ray Kurzweil

Gabe Newell

Barack Obama

Michelle Obama

The Fam

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Issue : People : Juanito

Tropico is a game about local politics. In it you play a dictator dealing with either providing the people with what they need or you with what you want. The trick is getting them basic infrastructure early, food, clothes, medicine, then working your way up to casinos, strip clubs, and hot air balloon rides. I mean you could choose to go with colleges and wind power, but them shits are slow burn returns and that palace statue ain't gonna build itself.

Whenever I get the hankering to play strats I work my way up by route of Command and Conquer to win the ground war --> Tropico to opiate the masses --> And Civilization to keep the party crakin' to the sunset.

And by party I mean two weeks of strat games which is barely an ironic party. But hey with the second screen I can watch full seasons of shows while I play, and... c'mon they can't all be fps's please don't judge me.

Anyway, Tropico 4 is free this weekend which also might be ironic and... oh yeah garages! If you play build lots of garages, pay the dock workers and builders a fair wage, and social security is a must or its not going to go well for you later in the game... trust me on this you don't want to spend a whole day on a build only to find that out.

The Protoculture Mixtape V.77 Issue : Games : United Fruit

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Issue : Regression : Southern Comfort

Issue Summary:
North Carolina is a state located around the bottom right of the United States of america. It's bordered by South Carolina and Georgia to the south, Tennessee to the west, and Virginia to the north. It's said to be the 10th most populous of the 50 states. The North Carolina flag is blue, red, and white, with some words located in the blue part. It's nicknames are "Tar Heel State," and "Old North State."

Obsidian entertainment was working on a video game nicknamed North Carolina, but it's probably not going to happen now. Which sucks, because North Carolina is not something that comes up in conversation usually, and I was looking forward to learning more about the area. Most people seem to only want to talk about California or New York, and stuff in "Middle Earth" usually gets passed over, even though a lot of shit appears to go on down there.

Issue Resolution Progress:
North Carolina has recently gotten attention for banning gay marriage. A surprising development considering no one knew that anyone had considered it safe to have gay marriage in North Carolina before, but I guess the state figured, "Better safe than sorry."

It is nice to know that America doesn't really need to apologize for the south anymore. People all over the world are starting to get what we here have silently carried around with us this whole time. They liked the old days, they liked Jim Crow, and having the ability to decide how another individual human being chases the constitutional right of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Straight up, I mean that is our swag and it is what it is, but I have a hard time finding a time in American history where the facts show it was not this way. We have to be at war with something, we have to have very defined good guys and bad guys, and the good guys have to make sure that the bad guys are kept in check. That's just where we live.

Stuff that everyone likes but can actually do damage can't be checked, but stuff that doesn't actually hurt anybody, but is seen as a societal anomaly by a majority, is fair game for the crowd to tear apart. And most people just watch it happen, and are glad it's not them this time.

People give white folks and religeous folks the brunt of the blame on this, but I have sat through enough conversations with black men and women of no religion who calmly argue against the right of another human being to marry, or a Hispanic man or woman who politely explain the differences between a "nigger," and "One of the good ones," to understand that the south is rising again in viral form.

Microsoft won't tell you that they could create the perfect live service, but they can never fix each separate individuals racism. A famous person won't tell you that a lot of times their fans embarrass them, a politician won't tell you the same about their constituents, and a corporation won't admit that the reason they sell the shit they sell at ridiculous prices is because the people really really want that nasty stuff, and would lose their minds if it wasn't there for them.

They won't, because they understand you cannot have a differing opinion on an issue around here without becoming the problem, and the crowd will turn and spit and shun you as the new game without a second thought, then find another willing applicant to put up there and start the process all over. The bug may be that the american public when gathered in majority just may be the biggest bully out there, but who is going to actually admit that? oh and creative heads jobs are in.

The Protoculture Mixtape V.76 Issue : Games : Straw 

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Issue : Games : Heatsinks

Computer people never openly agree on anything ever, but one thing that we all unanimously agree on forever is that heat sink clamps ain't about shit. The whole premise of a Mo-Bo is that it's this delicate city of circuits and components, each a single snowflake to be handled with the utmost care and precision.

And you sit there fussin' for hours until everything is in it's right place, ensuring all of the wires are out of the way and the area is well ventilated, then you look at dem clamps, plastic lobster claws with a retractable penis inside and instructions that basically say "Shove 'em in, twist 'em up, and don't stop till you hear a snap."

Ah man you forrealz right now? I got to go in there with a screwdriver (sike, butterknife, the tool box is way too far away), weave my hand around a bunch of silver diodes and flux capacitors and whatnot, and spin something till I hear a crunching sound, and believe I did not break anything? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.

Last time I upgraded those clamps did me dirty. I thought I had installed everything right, my card was supa hot fiah, I had 1000 watts pumping pure Alaskan air around like that Forest Gump feather. Shit was gtg.

But for the last two months I would be gummy bearing around Badwater and my rig would just turn off with an over temp pop up on reboot, I checked the usual suspects in bios, 80 degrees?! No, it can't be, my comp was in Hades! I was buggin, everything looked in order but it kept happening, I was trying everything, laying it on its side with fans on top, putting ice packs on it, asking the computer screen what it wanted me to do? It got real lord of the flies for a while there.

Then  one day out of nowhere I decided to open the case, 1 clamp was loose and I had been running on zero thermal compound this whole time. Wow.

The Protoculture Mixtape V.75 Issue : People : Topics

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